Following decades of success, popular ’90s singer Jewel admits that her previous shoplifting addiction and mental issues nearly destroyed her.
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While appearing on the No Magic Pill podcast last month, the singer-songwriter reflected on the struggles she faced at an early age. This included her mother leaving their family when she was 8 years old and her father becoming “physically abusive.”
“I made a promise really young not to do drugs or drink,” she said. “Again, I think just cuz I had such an extreme front row seat to seeing what it did. It didn’t look glamorous, you know, it didn’t look sexy. And some deep, deep part of me knew to be deadly terrified of it.”
At just 15, Jewel was living on her own. She later moved to San Diego to take care of her mother. However, paychecks would fall through the cracks, and bills would continue to stack up. After her mother moved back to Alaska, she decided to stay and live in her car. Although she was initially optimistic about the situation, she started to notice the impacts it had on her mental health.
“My panic attacks were getting worse,” she said. “My agoraphobia was getting worse. I didn’t have food. I didn’t have water.”
Jewel then noted, “I didn’t have anything. I didn’t have gas for that car.”
That was when she started shoplifting.
Jewel Said She Was At Her Lowest Point When She Started Shoplifting
Continuing to speak about her struggles, Jewel said her lowest point was when she started shoplifting.
“I started stealing food and stealing, like, herbs and things like that to try and … I had bad kidneys,” she reflected. “And then, it just kind of evolved into stealing things that weren’t food and things that I didn’t need.”
Jewel admitted that stealing for her became a real addiction. “It was compulsive. I couldn’t control it.”
However, she said things came to a head when she was in a changing room and tucking a stole dress into her pants. She found herself staring at herself in the mirror.
“I saw my reflection in the mirror and … I was a statistic,” she pointed out. “I’m a homeless kid shoplifting, and I’m going to end up in jail or dead if this keeps going.”
Jewel added that she learned to lean on a quote she remembered. “Happiness doesn’t depend on who you are or what you have. It depends on what you think.”