When it comes to bad pickup lines, “what’s your sign?” is right up there with “so, come here often?” But as it turns out, there’s more merit to that first question than one might think.
Our Zodiac profiles can determine a lot more than initial attraction. With patience, introspection, and empathy, they can also help us weather even the worst arguments with a partner.
So, dealing with your partner has felt like talking to a brick wall lately. Don’t keep charging forward, expecting a different result. Look up—the solution to your impasse could be in the stars.
How The Stars Help Us Communicate
Our Zodiac profile refers to our natal charts. Natal charts capture the position of the Sun, Moon, and stars at the exact moment of our birth. We use these charts to determine our Sun, Moon, Ascendant, and planetary assignments.
Moreover, every natal chart has twelve segments or Houses. Each House pertains to a different aspect of life. For example, the fifth House is the House of Pleasure, while the seventh House is the House of Interpersonal Relationships.
Using what we know about the energies and influence of each celestial body, we can gain deeper insight into those around us. More importantly, we can also gain insight into ourselves.
Every natal chart assignment pertains to a specific element of interpersonal conflict.
Using The Big Three
The “big three” of the Zodiac are the Sun, Moon, and Ascendant signs. Solar assignments speak to a person’s life purpose. They also determine the ego’s role in decision-making.
Conflicts are largely rooted in the desires of the ego. Thus, a person’s solar assignment can offer clarity as to why they started a fight in the first place. A Virgo Sun, for example, might start a fight if they feel their judgment (and, in turn, ego) is being challenged.
Conversely, the Moon speaks to our inner shadow selves. A lunar assignment reveals what a person needs to feel nurtured. Someone with an Aries Moon, for example, might not feel a fight has closure if it doesn’t end in physical intimacy.
Lastly, the Ascendant reveals a person’s general perspective. What moral code do they live by? What is their overall approach to life and external interaction? Taurus Risings, for example, are slow to accept change and need more time to digest differing opinions.
Finding Finer Details With Planets
Additionally, each planetary assignment gives us an even more specific idea of how our partners fight. Mercury governs how a person communicates and processes information. Venus, on the other hand, refers to how we wish to give and receive love.
Mars dictates our physicality and aggression, from fights to sex and everything in between. Mars is the last of the inner planets, which influence our individualities more acutely than the outer planets. Still, these outer planets are not side effect free.
Jupiter, the first of the outer planets, refers to an individual mind’s expansiveness. How open are they to new opportunities or ideas? How interested are they in personal growth? Those with stubborn Jupiter placements can seem especially brick-wall-like in arguments.
On the other hand, Saturn governs how we handle challenges and discipline. This planetary assignment speaks volumes to what a person does when the going gets tough. The last three planets—Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto—have far more generational effects.
Uranus speaks to our willingness to adopt new perspectives, while Neptune dictates our sense of spirituality and emotional health. Finally, Pluto governs the subconscious and power dynamics. Because of their lengthy orbits, two partners would need an age gap of seven or more years to have a different Uranus, Neptune, or Pluto assignment.
Using Houses For Context
Finally, we can use our Houses to learn even more about ourselves and others. It’s important to note which planets and constellations are in which House, as their energies directly influence whichever life aspect the House governs.
Every natal chart has the following twelve houses (and we’ve bolded the Houses that are particularly important when it comes to relationships):
- 1st House of Self: Ego, life force, vitality
- 2nd House of Value: Resources, wealth, self-worth
- 3rd House of Communications: Communcation and extended family
- 4th House of Home & Family: Parents, home life, past
- 5th House of Pleasure: Sex, romance, creativity
- 6th House of Health: General health, work life, daily routines
- 7th House of Partnerships: Committed relationships
- 8th House of Reincarnation: Mental health, death, joint ventures
- 9th House of Philosophy: Travel, education, philosophy
- 10th House of Social Status: Career, public roles, legacy
- 11th House of Friendships: Community and friendships
- 12th House of Self-Undoing: Sorrow, loss, subconscious
The 4th, 5th, and 7th Houses are all particularly telling about a partner’s argument style. The 4th House refers directly to a partner’s childhood and past experiences. Each heartbreak and joyful moment throughout a person’s life affects how they deal (or don’t deal) with conflict.
The 5th House, on the other hand, speaks to what a partner needs to feel happy in a relationship. What brings them joy? What makes them swoon? This assignment can shed light on secret desires your partner might not have voiced to you yet.
Lastly, the 7th House speaks directly to relationships—namely, long-term, committed ones. Understanding your partner’s 7th House assignment can be the difference between a long-lasting marriage and one rife with conflict.
How To Weather The Storms Together
It takes more than knowing your partner’s natal chart to weather a storm. Indeed, it’s the combination of your two charts that will determine how you should best handle conflict. Identify harmonious and dissonant relationships, and go from there.
For example, a relationship with a Pisces and Scorpio Mercury can become difficult due to a lack of clear communication. A Pisces Mercury prefers to sugarcoat their speech, while a Scorpio Mercury is ruthlessly blunt. This makes Pisces feel attacked, and Scorpio feels confused.
However, if both partners had Venus in their 7th House, they could find common ground in giving and receiving affection. Their conflicts might be turbulent, but their similar love styles allow them to make up more quickly.
Navigating our comprehensive Zodiac profiles can be confusing. Still, it’s not nearly as confusing as the unnamed complexities of ourselves on any given day. Co-existing with other humans, as layered and convoluted as you are, can be challenging.
But with patience and a little celestial guidance, it can be a lot easier than you think.