Valentine’s Day is tomorrow! Whether you’re cuddling up with a long-time love, a new flame, or just… yourself, it’s the perfect excuse to let your heart race… courtesy of a good horror movie.
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Looking to skip the romance and get straight to the “action”? We’ve got a selection of horror flicks that are more about carnal desires than candy hearts. These films get right to the point, delivering enough steam and screams to make your Valentine’s Day (and maybe your bed frame) rock.
‘The Hunger’
When it comes to horror infused with a bite of sex, vampires are the front line.
In his directorial debut, Tony Scott gives us Catherine Deneuve as a vampire who decides her centuries-old lover, David Bowie, is past his expiration date. She quickly moves on to a new “friend,” Susan Sarandon, kicking off a steamy romance while poor John withers away. Of course… we’ve all been there.
It’s a morally ambiguous love story that’s heavy on the sensuality and serves as a not-so-subtle reminder that new relationships are all-consuming, while older ones take… a lot of effort.
‘Bram Stoker’s Dracula’
Francis Ford Coppola’s Bram Stoker’s Dracula oozes with passion, gothic romance, and, let’s be real, a whole lot of sex appeal. In this 1992 film, Gary Oldman gives a little for ladies of all tastes. He rocks a butt bun in his creepy old man phase and iconic John Lennon shades as his younger, thirst-trap self. And let’s not forget that wild scene where Dracula goes full wolf-man to engage (okay, make whoopee) with the lovelorn Lucy.
It’s dark, it’s steamy, it’s unhinged. Woof.
Plus, it features peak Winona Ryder and Keanu Reeves, who, let’s be honest, could both still get it.
‘The Shape of Water’
Guillermo del Toro’s The Shape of Water might just be the ultimate monster mash (and no, not the dance…). The 2017 film follows Elisa (Sally Hawkins), a lonely woman whose daily routine includes boiling eggs and indulging in some “me time” in the tub. Her life takes a wild turn when she meets and falls head over heels for a sexy fish-man (Doug Jones).
This 2018 Best Picture winner proves love knows no bounds… even for a fish-man. Del Toro’s magic, Hawkins’ brilliance, and Jones’ humanity make this unconventional romance unforgettable.
And for the record… it goes there.
‘The Loved Ones’
Okay, maybe you’re just looking for a genuinely terrifying movie but need a romantic justification to get your date to agree (or to tell yourself you’re not lonely… we’re not judging).
2009’sThe Loved Ones is a tale of teenage (unrequited) love and torture set against prom night. What could be more perfect for Valentine’s Day?
When grieving teenager Brent Mitchell, played by Xavier Samuels, turns down a prom invitation from school outcast Lola, he finds himself kidnapped. Now he is at the mercy of Lola and her creepy father. A nightmare prom night of torture, bloodshed, and dark secrets ensues.
This one is also a nice change of pace because the victim is the boy (a heart is literally carved into his chest for Cupid’s sake!) while the aggressor is a crazed teen girl.
If these picks are a bit too edgy for your tastes, there’s always the classic Universal Studios Dracula. Starring the immortal Bela Lugosi, this film turns an amazing 95 this Valentine’s Day… proving that some romances truly never die…