It can be hard to see red flags when wearing the rose-colored glasses during a relationship’s honeymoon stage. But just because you can’t see them doesn’t mean they’re not there.
If you answer yes to any of these questions, it may be time to reconsider your romance.
Do They Push Physical Or Emotional Boundaries?
Respect is key to any relationship, and that means respecting physical, sexual and emotional boundaries. Anyone who pushes your buttons for fun, coerces you into intimacy, or relishes in making you feel uncomfortable does not respect you: no ifs, ands or buts, sis.
Do They Badmouth Or Compare You To Their Ex?
Pay attention to how they talk about their exes (and how often). Badmouthing or comparing you to their ex could mean one, they haven’t fully moved on, two, they’re unwilling or incapable of accepting their responsibility in the break-up or three, they’ll talk about you the same way to the next person.
Did Your Relationship Begin Before Their Last One Ended?
Look, I’m sure you’re great. But your partner stepping out on their last ex to be with you doesn’t mean you’re inherently unique. It just means they’re capable of infidelity and that it’s likely only a matter of time before they do the same to you.
Are They Overprotective Or Jealous?
The keyword here is overprotective. Sure, your partner should have your back. But they shouldn’t care if you wear make-up out but not at home with them, whether you had a harmless convo at the bar or if you post a selfie on your Insta. Controlling is not cute.
Do Your Family And Friends Dislike This Person?
More often than not, the people closest to you will be able to catch the red flags your googly-eyed self might be missing. For example, is everyone in your life asking you, “Why are you with them?!” If so, maybe it’s time to consider that question yourself.
Do They Have Trouble Saying Sorry?
We all f*@$ up sometimes, and in the heat of the moment, it can be hard to swallow your pride and apologize. But if your partner never says sorry, mid-fight or afterward, that could indicate an emotional blockage you do not want to become responsible for undoing.
Do They Feel Entitled To Your Passwords?
Asking for your passcode to use your phone real quick is one thing. However, feeling entitled to all private information is another. Healthy relationships require trust and privacy. And if your partner is uncomfortable granting you either, then they might be hiding major control issues.
Do You Feel Uncomfortable Talking To Them?
Open, vulnerable communication is critical in any healthy relationship. You should be able to express your dreams, desires, and fears freely and without judgment. (Note: this does not include telling them how hot you find your cycling instructor. Save that for your friends.)
Are You More Involved With Their Life Than They Are With Yours?
Are you constantly hanging out with their friends, doing what they want to do, learning about their interests, with little to no reciprocation? It might be time to dump them—it sounds like they’re more into themselves, anyway.
Are You Constantly Chasing The “Good” Moments?
Relationships aren’t waiting rooms for happiness; a healthy partnership just makes you happy. So if you’re constantly pining for the “good” times, or if they leave you feeling more anxious than content, it could be a clear sign the relationship has run its course.
All relationships are different, and I’m not trying to suggest I know more about your relationship than you do. Nevertheless, love makes us all a little naive sometimes. And if you’re scouring the internet for signs that your relationship might not be what it should, well, that’s red flag number one.