We use a variety of euphemisms to refer to menopause: The Change, The Switch, etc. But surely we can get more creative than that, right? The r/Menopause subreddit recently weighed in on this topic and brainstormed some other terms that can be used in place of “menopause.” They had us cracking up, so here are some of our favorites.
1. The F*ckoning
One user suggested using all caps for this term to add emphasis. Another shared, “I laughed way too hard at this which, of course, made me pee a little. For me, THIS is the answer.”
“Remember the movie trailer voice-over guy?” one woman asked. “They f*cked around and now they will find out. See what happens when you dare to disturb …THE F*CKONING!”
This was another popular option that users insisted should be in all caps, because “if said out loud, it needs to be angrily shouted.”
“We should really have a Netflix series titled Murderpause,” one user noted. “We’re here. We’re hot. We won’t be ignored.”
3. Second Spring
This term is apparently popular in Japan, and some Redditors really liked it because of the positive tone. It makes menopause sound like a beautiful thing, doesn’t it?
“I love this, it’s like getting a second chance. Very optimistic perspective,” one user shared.
4. Victoria’s Secret
We dare you to find us a Gen X woman who hasn’t spent hundreds of dollars on bras and panties at Victoria’s Secret in her lifetime.
As one user explained, “We could also just call it Victoria’s Secret [because] I am pretty sure this is what she was keeping from us.”
This was another popular suggestion, but, as one user pointed out, “might as well just shorten it to “Hell.”
6. Gland Finale
A personal favorite of mine, I think this is a clever and kind of elegant way to refer to this stage of life.
Admittedly, this one would really only work in writing, but we still appreciate the wordplay.
8. Evolutionary Mayhem
We think this is a fitting term to encapsulate the chaos that ensues (physically and emotionally) when you find yourself smack dab in the middle of menopause.
9. Hyper Puberty
Finally, we really loved the term “Hyper Puberty,” which is a suggestion that came from a daughter who’s currently witnessing her mom go through perimenopause.
“As far as I’ve observed, I guess it could be called Hyper Puberty,” she wrote. “Apart from her hot flashes, I feel like I’m witnessing what I went through [in] puberty with her, but on a much grander scale.”