Whether someone’s just casually dating or looking for “the one,” there’s no doubt that the dating world can be complicated. After denying another’s affections, a lot of male egos can get damaged in the game, but how do women handle being turned down? Men reveal their dramatic, shocking, and even threatening responses from women after they had to end it. Content has been edited for clarity.
“When I was graduating with my Masters, my girlfriend was really hinting that she wanted to get married. I didn't, and was super clear on that. So, she broke it off right before I went to visit my parents for a week. I was a bit bummed out on the way home, and a couple of days after, but then she called and said she wanted to talk when I got back. By then though, I had the feeling she would want to get back together, and expect we would get engaged or married, and that's exactly what happened.
When I got back she acted like everything was fine and talking about us getting serious. After that, we sat down and told her it was over. All of a sudden, she was suicidal, and even ran to the kitchen to get a knife, and threatened to slit her wrists. I finally pulled the knife away, only after getting cut myself, and locked her in the bathroom where nothing sharp was, and called a friend of mine to give us a ride, so I could take her home. Honestly, at that point I didn't want to leave her in a cab, where she might act crazy, or go missing or something. But that's not the end of it. It had just begun.
The next morning, I woke up to at least thirty texts and five missed calls, which I decided to ignore. Then it escalated to around forty texts a day and twenty or so missed calls for about a week. Then notes in my car.
Then a friend of hers came to my house to talk to me. She tried to explain what went wrong and apologized for my ex. But I told her I would not get back together with her, regardless of her excuses. And then when that didn't work, she sent two friends of hers to beat me up. Luckily, I had a couple friends over at my apartment at the time, so they backed off. The next morning I came out to two slashed tires on my car. And I almost missed a job interview.
She would stalk me by staying at a cafe across the street from my place for hours, monitoring who came in and who came out and what time. And the final straw was when, after about three months passed, I had started dating a different girl. One day, we went to my apartment to watch movies and chill, and I got a call about an hour in. I had changed my number, so my ex- couldn’t contact me. But it was a friend of mine saying that he got a call from my ex saying that ‘the girl with the brown hair and red blouse’ (exactly the description) was ‘too ugly for me and she wanted to mess her up.’ I ended up making the girl a nice dinner and we had a bottle of vino- that way we could waste time (and enjoy ourselves) waiting for my ex to leave her post at the cafe. Moral of the story: Even if you think you know someone completely, they may still surprise you.”
“Me and this girl were seeing each other, but I chose to break it off. We had fought, and there had been a lot of yelling between us, but it never lead anything physical or violent.
But as she was boxing up some of her things, she nonchalantly tells me, ‘Oh, by the way, my brother says he wants to smash your head in and watch your brains leak out.’
I didn’t say anything, but it scared me. I honestly didn’t know what she may have said or told him to warrant such an aggressive statement. But, luckily, I’m okay.”
"I was working at a coffee shop and my manager took a liking to me. I was pretty oblivious to it because a) I wasn't attracted to her in any way, and b) I had a girlfriend at the time.
Everyone working at the shop was pretty young, and we would all hang out sometimes. But at our Christmas party, she tried to sit on my lap. That made me very uncomfortable, so I left soon after.
Within weeks, I started getting calls from a blocked number on my cell phone at all hours of the day and night. And my girlfriend would get the same types of calls too- though sometimes it would be a woman saying things like ‘he doesn't love you,’ or ‘he's going to break up with you.’
Eventually, she started getting emails to the same effect. It was extremely creepy and it was only much later, (after I was no longer working at the coffee shop), that I realized who was likely doing it. My girlfriend and I figured she had gotten into my phone somehow (when I left it in the back room or whatever) to get her contact information."
“There was this girl (let’s call her Stacy) at work who secretly had a crush on me. Years went by before I found out, and she was let go shortly after. Stacy and I regularly had lunch breaks at the same time, so we often talked. But I wouldn’t have considered her a super close friend, just a coworker.
One day, I had lunch with my girlfriend, and hadn’t talked with Stacy, and as I was leaving work and walking to my car, Stacy approached me. From behind me, she asked ‘who was that woman with you at lunch?’ When I explained it was my girlfriend, Stacy started making a huge deal about it. My explanation didn’t seem to calm or settle her down. So, confused, a little scared, I stated I had to get home, and quickly left. At work the next day, Stacy was not there. I felt relieved because she had made the previous day so uncomfortable and awkward. But even the next week, Stacy was still not back, and I had no clue why.
After the second week of Stacy being absent, one of her team members, Tammy, decided to ask me why Stacy needed to take such a long break. This question caught me off guard and confused me even more, so I answered, ‘Why would I know anything about that? Stacy and I only talk at work. I don't even have her number.’ At this point it was hard to tell who was more confused, Tammy or me. I could literally see the gears turning in Tammy's head as she was trying to formulate her next question. Eventually it comes out, ‘I thought you and Stacy we're going out. She tells us about all the amazing dates you go on all the time!’ Tammy then proceeded to tell me about some of these dates. These were all dates that I had taken my girlfriend on and told Stacy about. My mouth and throat were completely dry, and I felt like throwing up. Stacy had constructed a life with me doing things with her that I do with my actual girlfriend and then presented this to her team. I told Tammy that I do in fact have a girlfriend, but Stacy is NOT her. I pulled out my phone and showed Tammy pictures of my girlfriend and me together. While my girlfriend and Stacy share similar heights and builds, they don’t look that similar. Regardless, Tammy was probably more confused than I was at that moment and seemed to slink away back to her desk.
Stacy showed up the following week. And while walking into the building, refused to make eye contact. About an hour later she was removed from the building by my boss and the head of security. Stacy was clearly furious. Apparently Tammy confronted Stacy about her fantasies before Stacy could even get to her own desk, which caused Stacy to have a meltdown and attacked Tammy.”
“I dated a girl for almost two years in high school. We were together during my freshman and sophomore years, but she was two years older than me. Things kind of got a little awkward after she graduated. I dumped her at her house, and she instantly, fell to the floor in tears, and held my ankles to try to prevent me from leaving. She then proceeded to follow me around in her car for a while, before just giving up, and going home.
Months and months later, when I got a random text. I had forgotten about the whole thing with her, but wanted to see what she had to say. She tells me she has a child, and it is mine. She sends me a picture of this little boy, claiming to be my son. Turns out, it was just a kid she had been babysitting. I then blocked her from everything.”
“One time my friend hooked me up with a girl at a bar. She seemed pretty cool at first, but after our second date, she seemed a little off. We were hanging out at her apartment and she stared to creep me out by following me around. And then at the slightest bit of criticism or any type of comment she didn’t like, she would fly off the rails. If I said anything negative, she would get kind of suicidal. I didn’t want to make things worse, but I had to break it off.
So, one day, she was being weird, and stressing me out, and we got into a little argument. In the heat of it, I said the words ‘we should probably see other people.’ She immediately quit talking, and just stood there with a blank expression, not responding to what I said. After a few seconds of just standing there dumbfounded, I go ‘Well, okay, I am going to take off now.’ But right when I turned around to go out the door, she let out this freakishly creepy laugh. She grabbed a pocket knife from the counter, and lunged after me. She ended up being able to throw me up against the wall, and yelled, ‘You're not going anywhere!’
After spending a few minutes keeping her off me, and pleading with her to stop, I made the conscious decision to grab her hand she had the knife in. She fought me, and through the struggle made a way to close call swipe at my throat. I quickly broke her wrist, which forced her to jump off me as she screamed in anguish. I ran out of her apartment, stumbling the entire way until I could get to my phone. Locked myself in my car, and called the police.
If that wasn't horrifying enough, when the cops came and saw the scratches on my face, and the tears in my shirt, they walked in and put her in cuffs. The entire time they questioned us, we were literally in eye site of one another. And the whole time, she stared at me, with that same creepy stare from before. Afterwards, the cops walked her out of her apartment and put her in the back of the squad car. But then there she was, with that stare again. She stared at me, mouthing (then chanting), ‘I'm gonna get you,’ in an almost inhuman voice. Seriously, that vision still haunts me to this day, almost six years later. Since then, I’ve taken a little break from dating. I have never watched someone become completely unhinged like that before.”
“A friend of mine stalked a boy in our high school class for over two years. She would always tell people (faculty included) how she wanted to marry him, have his kids, keep him in her basement, etc. Apparently, it was mostly joking, but her crush on him was real.
Anyway, one of the teachers ratted her out, and she was told that she would get hit with a restraining order if my friend wanted to press charges. She was mortified, but luckily he didn’t want to pursue anything with the authorities. And after that she cooled down the stalking, but only for a while.
Fast forward, only a year goes by, and she says she is over him. But not really. She decided to solicit him for extremely perverted acts via direct messaging online, and then told everyone about it. She was reported by a faculty member yet again.”
“I knew her for about four months. And we can call her Emily. Emily was in my Biology class. It all started when she randomly told me that she had a huge crush on me and wanted to go out. I was flattered, but I really didn't want to be in a relationship. So, I politely rejected her offer, but asked her if we could still be friends, and she said yes.
Three weeks before our biology final, I tore my meniscus. I was in excruciating pain and had to undergo surgery, so I had to miss a lot of class. So, I decided to ask Emily for some help making up work and studying. And a couple of days before the final Emily (bless her heart) tutored me for hours. But here’s the kicker.
The day of the final rolled around, and I’m all cool, calm, and collected, ready to get the exam behind me. But as soon as the professor hands out the exam, I look at it, and my heart sank. Nothing on the exam was stuff I learned and studied for. Emily had prepared me for a completely different exam entirely, and I was outraged. Emily had fooled me. A week later when we got our results, I had failed while Emily aced it. And I ended up having to retake the whole class.”
“To be fair, I was totally into the girl at first, so my rejection might have stung a little.
We were basically friends with benefits, and she was legitimately super attractive to me. But as time went on, I learned more and more about her that made me not want to be with her. Just sleep with her, sure, but not build a whole life together.
So when she made the move for more than just friends with benefits, and I said no, she told me she was going to go sleep with a dude she knew I hated, film it, and then send it to me.
They're married now, with kids. So, I mean, good for them I guess.”
“I dated a girl for a couple weeks, and on our third date we chilled at my place and talked. She told me that she thought guys who watched adult films were disgusting, and if they were in a relationship she considered it cheating.
Ten minutes later, out of nowhere, she asked to use my computer. I knew the last thing I had open was not going to impress her, so I said maybe some other time. She got way too angry at my reply, and explained her intention was to only write me an email about how much she really liked me (psh- okay)?
After a little bit of chilling and talking, I said I thought it would be best to call it a night and drove her home. While in the car, she went quiet until about halfway to her place. She says, ‘My Dad’s best friend is a cop. I can say what I want.’ I got the gist, but figured it was an attempt to make me reconsider. But I just kept driving. When I dropped her off she started crying very loudly, fell down in her parent’s driveway, and crawled to the front door.
Sure enough, next day I was arrested for assault and it took a week for her to admit she made it up. And the charges weren’t dropped for seven months.”
“I dated this girl once, and at first, I rejected her advances because she was underage. But then she was kind of creepy, despite being very pretty. We did have similar interests, so that is initially why we became friends. However, I made sure I never made any remarks or gestures out of the ordinary that could be mistaken as affection.
After we stopped talking, I realized she had created a blog about our ‘interactions.’ It was strange. But the worst part is that she had taken pictures of me sleeping and captioned them with all the things she wanted me to do to her! I think that when I was dating this other girl, she came to visit her (and acted like her friend), just to be sneaky. She would take pictures of me sleeping whenever my then girlfriend was out of the room. It’s kind of terrifying to think about, because who knows, she could have killed me or something.
Years later, I’ve heard she’s turned out to be a ‘normal’ functioning adult.”
“We were friends, but hooked up a couple of times. I told her I didn’t wanna hook up with her anymore because I was interested in somebody else. We talked on and off for a bit, but never really hung out because of our history, and I didn’t feel comfortable with seeing her in person. Strictly platonic.
Then one day she texted me saying that she was physically assaulted, and forced upon, and that she needed somebody to talk to. So, I called her to see if she was okay, and she was balling on the phone. I made an exception about not seeing her in person this time. But when I was with her, she ran to me, and cried in my arms for a little, then slowly started reaching into pants. I told her I wasn’t into it and she went off.
She started screaming about how she couldn’t believe I would reject her in her time of need, and that she just needed somebody to care about her, to love her, to hold her and touch her body, etc.The real kicker though? Somewhere in her rambling, she said that she completely lied about what had happened to her. I dropped her off a block away from her house, yelled at her to get out of my car, and just went ghost on her after.”
“My sister-in-law's best friend. I couldn't stand being around her. She was obnoxious, loud and always turned me off. But for some reason, my brother and sister in law would constantly plan date nights for the four of us, and then they would find a way to recede into the night so the two of us would be alone. I was nice at first, but then her flirting went into overdrive. She was always smiling at me and caressing me and laughing at my jokes even though I wasn't trying to be funny. I ended up having to put the brakes on, became short with my answers, and practically sat on my hands. I wanted to make sure I wasn't sending any signals out.
After several get-togethers, she finally got the hint. Unfortunately, she couldn't handle the rejection and started bad-mouthing me to anyone with a listening ear. I was confronted several times by family members and mutual friends about how mean I was to her. I was even told that she told someone, who I don't even know, that I had too much to drink and started grabbing her. She couldn't handle my rejection like a grownup, so she just made me out to be a prick instead.”
“I was in high school and found out this girl was cheating on me, so I broke up with her.
She wanted to get back together, but I wasn't going to fall into that again. So, she would text me like once a month trying to start conversations to get back togehter. But I kept it to only small talk, and for maybe five minutes each time, before killing the conversation. Every time I rejected her she would get infuriated, and then she would badmouth me around school.
She tried convincing my friends that I'm gay. She tried saying I beat her. The list goes on and on. Oh, and she tried convincing me that she was pregnant. She made comments like 'You're going to be a dad.' I went to her house on a Saturday and told her I will pay for a pregnancy test, but she got really upset and started making excuses. Luckily, nobody ever believed her and I graduated, so I don't have to deal with her.
She still tries getting back together though."
“Once I broke up with a girlfriend and she became very upset. She called my best friend and told him that I liked to get violent, and beat her up when we were alone, which is something I would never do. She told my friends and other classmates tons of lies about me all because I broke up with her. Out of all the things, the worst was when a classmate (a female) came up to me and asked me if I really got a genital disease from that adult ‘entertainer’ I had relations with?”
"I had a girlfriend in college that had cheated on me. She cheated on me with several people. And after we broke up, she eventually came crawling back. She would beg me, and plead for another chance together, and promised to be loyal to me forever. But I had learned my lesson, and turned her away.
She responded by breaking into my house, and killing my cat."