"I'm pretty sure my kid is a sociopath at least and she is only 4. I realized this about 2 months ago.
She does things that are intentionally mean and hurtful, both physically and emotionally. She abuses our animals, she intentionally hurts us and others, under the disguise of giving hugs. She has dug her fingers into the necks of our family including her older sibling. These aren't things done when she's mad, and the creepiest part is that she laughs when she does these types of things.
I suspect she may also do these things to children at school. She manipulates the kids at school sometimes, to get them in trouble. She gets in trouble a lot at school as well for disobedience and the like.
We took her for a psychological evaluation and they wanted to do a whole work up. They even mentioned autism, but I don't think that's it, or not all of it. She honestly scares me at times and I won't leave her alone with other children or our animals, even to use the restroom."
"My 17-year-old son robbed a guy in a wheelchair, behind a Burger King. The man never reported it and we only found out about it much later, when he was bragging about it.
My son is now 19 and has been in jail/mental institutions for most of the last five years. I honestly don't think he knows how to function in the real world anymore.
He has been a little brat since he was 13, but this was the lowest. Actually, up until age 13, he was a wonderful kid. His teachers loved him, we always did volunteer work together as a family, and he was a fantastic big brother. That's one of the things that was hardest to accept because we felt like the son we knew was gone.
My husband and I used to feel guilty for his behaviors when they first started. We tried therapy, medications, hospitalizations, and anything suggested. We raised our sons the same, and with completely different outcomes. The only difference is that our oldest is adopted and our youngest is biologically my husband's and I. I am absolutely NOT saying that adopted children are somehow different, but the foundation of his childhood was vastly different. His birth mother abandoned him just after his first birthday and then had sporadic contact until his adoption was finalized when he was three. She, herself, had significant mental health issues, some of which were passed down to our son. We knew this was a possibility and just had to do the best we could to give him as normal of a life as possible."
"After over a decade of being a complete screw-up, my friend's son (26, still living with his parents) ran over a pedestrian last week. Before that, his most despised episode was stealing money from his family members while the rest of us were in the living room with his dying grandfather.
He had been drinking at the time that he ran over the pedestrian. It was the second or third time he's been pulled over for driving under the influence.
I felt sorry for this kid since the day I met him when he was three. This extended family became my family long ago (no marriage, just good friends). I did what I could. Everyone did. His aunts, especially. But all his life his parents coddled him to the point of craziness. Example: He has older cousins and when everyone got together, like any normal kid he didn't want to go to bed earlier than his cousins, but he was four years younger than they were. So his mother asked everyone to put their kids to bed at his bedtime, so he wouldn't feel bad. That has been the mindset. Another example: He was about 16 when he stole the money. The adults got together with him to talk about it and said he had to give it back. He had already spent it, so he agreed to sell his laptop. His mom was really traumatized by the whole thing, and she paid everyone back herself, so he could keep his laptop (remember, this is during the last couple of days of his grandfather's life, and all of us were dealing with that). He continued to steal, from his parents at least. His dad arranged therapy with a psychologist for the kid and went with him to the appointments. The kid refused to engage at all - completely silent. After two or three appointments he refused to go back, so that was that.
Last year he started calling his mom names, shoving her around, and threatening her with a large kitchen knife. Only when his dad wasn't home, of course. Once she had the locks changed and wouldn't give him a key. He broke a window and took the key from her. He's been arrested a couple of times. His parents bail him out and he refuses to get a job. His dad has a vending machine route for a little extra cash, and let the kid take it over. Well, he stopped showing up for work so he could party with his friends. Then he lost his driver's license. So the kid is officially a lost cause."
"A long time friend is a single mother, she's a handful, but her toddler is...troubling.
I was hanging out with him one day and he started pinching me.
So I asked:
'Why are you pinching me?' He said: 'Because I hate you.'
I said: 'That's not nice, I don't hate you.'
He replied: 'And I'm gonna cut your eyes off, and cut your nose off, and cut your lips off.'
(My dumbfounded expression of concern towards single mother friend) 'That was...weird', she said.
She then denied that he ever said that and completely ignores all of the clear 'psychopath-in-the-making' traits. Traits like his cruelty to animals and disrespect for elders. Oh, he also doesn't eat regularly, and he's allowed to stay up past midnight because she's getting plastered and that clearly takes precedence over the well being of her child.
The whole situation is messed up. She's a terrible mother, he's a terrible kid. I distanced myself from my friend and the entire friendship, because I don't need that kind of stuff in my life, nor do I need to aid and abet it."
"I worked as an Au Pair (live in nanny sort of deal) for a German family, for about 10 months last year.
The parents had to travel a lot for work, which I knew going into it, though I was told it was not that frequent or for that long - biggest lie they told me.
They have 3 children: a 17-year-old boy, a 15-year-old boy, and an 11-year-old girl. I basically did everything for these kids. I made their breakfasts, their school lunches, their dinners, did all their laundry, cleaned their rooms, made their beds, helped them with homework, hung out with them, everything (including the parents' cleaning and laundry, which I was not supposed to do).
Not a big deal, I don't mind housework and I love cooking, but dang, the girl was the worst child I ever experienced in my life, and I had a ton of experience working with kids, especially kids from poor, rough backgrounds. This girl was incredibly spoiled by her father, like any little girl, and her mother was not usually around.
One evening we were playing Rummikub and we all beat her (myself, her brothers, and her dad). She threw a monstrous fit. She LITERALLY flipped the table, screaming and sobbing, and when her older brother told her to calm down, she lunged at him! She grabbed his leg, and bit him and tore off flesh. SHE FREAKING TORE FLESH FROM HIS CALF! Then her father started yelling at her, so she bit him on the arm until he bled. He started screaming at her, at which point she started to sob, and then he comforted her. He told her it was ok and asked if she wanted ice cream. ICE CREAM?! NOPE! If she was my child, or I had authority at that moment, she'd be done.
Another time I was helping my host mother put away the Christmas decorations. Well, the daughter was in a horrible mood, as usual, and was sitting on the stairs to the basement. They live in a very beautiful, modern home, and the stairs are made of concrete and steel. I am carrying a box of Christmas stuff, this demon child stretches out her leg, and trips me down the stairs. Luckily I caught myself before I fell, but if I had fallen I could have been seriously injured. The mother refused to believe that her daughter did that to me and yelled at me for being clumsy and dropping the box.
There were also just the usual temper tantrums; anything would set her off. She'd have friends over and be mad that they got a bigger cookie and start throwing things all over the house, throw herself on the floor, and just scream. She was horrible.
A side note: The two youngest kids drank hot chocolate out of baby bottles in the morning - legit baby bottles. Ugh."
"My nephew is a demon!
He curses at my sister (who is his stepmother) that she hates him, that he'd rather die than be in this family. He has been suspended from school for fighting a bunch of times. Then it boiled over this weekend.
She sent him to his room for not doing his chores, so he started bouncing a basketball against his door to be annoying. My sister told him to stop, so he got a bat, came out of his room, and smashed the spindles of the upstairs banister while screaming, 'I'm not paying to fix this!' So there's my pregnant sister, standing there, watching her stepson violently destroy the house. His dad was called to punish him, and the solution was that he had to stay home from his mom's for the weekend because she just spoils the kids.
This kid wants to go live with his mom, who, by the way, has a kid with some guy who is in prison that she never dated. He has been roommates with college students as a thirty-something, can't afford sheets for the bed he sleeps on and hasn't paid child support once, in his 13 years of life. He tried to convince my sister that she had a handshake agreement with my sister's husband that she didn't actually have to pay child support, and therefore the 20k or so that she owes in back child support is null...
His fraternal twin brother is an alright kid, he can be a jerk sometimes and he's a little addicted to the internet, but ultimately he's a good kid. When he does act hurt by my sister's actions, it's by hiding in his room and crying; I like his way better."
"When my mum has gotten a bit tipsy (she's just a lightweight) and had a heart to heart with me, she admitted genuinely fearing for my brother's future and those who'll interact with him. He has moments of kindness but they're few and far between.
When he got his first girlfriend, mum was already worried because 'He won't put the work in and she'll not bother and it'll break his heart.' Well, he broke it off. We still saw her, because mum and I both really enjoyed this girl! She was sweet, thoughtful, bought him gifts and was always unfailingly polite. I'm sure she wasn't an angel, but she's still a good person. He is not.
They're both sixteen, so still in high school. I'd graduated a year or two ago. My friend heard from her own younger brother that my brother was threatening to leak explicit photos of this girl online if she ever tried to hang out with their friends (same friend group). He basically forced her into a miserable isolation by holding these photos over her and his friend was worried, so he went to his eldest sister who in turn told me.
I had my own history of a guy doing the same to me, except he did leak them and I was bullied to the point of attempted suicide. When I found out I was livid. I went and dug up all the photos and deleted them from both his phone and computer, the conversation they were sent through and checked a few other things to make sure he hadn't sent them. Idiot kid would have gotten himself in serious trouble because he's a bitter little jerk.
Eventually, I told mum and that's how we got to the conversation of her worrying for him. He really is an undeniably selfish person. The world exists to please him, he deserves the best of everything. Mum bought him a $3000 Alienware PC, a $2000 Alienware laptop and now he's asking for a laptop for school. She redid his room and expanded it, he's got a gaming setup worth at least $7000, couches, King size bed, a TV, and he refuses to get a job because he has 'anxiety.' He's conned mum and dad into giving him an allowance, despite throwing a fit if you ask him to do anything. Some days I really do hate him.
Yes, my mum enables him. But ever since he was young, he made it a point to let her know he resented her because he's adopted. My mother's biggest fear is never being a good parent, so she caved into him since dad left and she didn't have his support either. I'm worried he's just going to be a parasite to her life until she's broke and he finds someone else to support him."
"I struggle to admit this because it isn't easy to admit when you have an out-of-control child.
I have a five-year-old who scared the daylights out of me. It's terrible, I should not even have this fear about a five-year-old, but a few months ago, it really wouldn't have shocked me if he ended up in jail. It's absolutely the fault of myself and his dad, and there just isn't any way around that.
Basically, I had postpartum depression immediately following his birth. I've never had this with any other pregnancy, but I knew what it was and still neglected to get help for it. That led to total apathy the first two years of his life. I literally just went through the motions of parenthood. Yes, my son was fed, clothed and had his physical needs met, but I had completely checked out emotionally right after he was born. His dad was working at a factory and gone most of the time. My son got whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted simply because I wanted to parent the easy way and not argue with him or discipline him. It was too much work, and I just didn't give a care. It's humiliating admitting this, but I absolutely failed as a parent those two years, and the difference between my son and my other kids is staggering.
My son lies, not to get his butt out of trouble or to make up imaginative tales like other kids, he just lies for the heck of it, just because he can. He's good at it too! I can watch him do whatever point blank only to have him lie to me about it two seconds later and almost convince me that I'm crazy. He lies to get other children in trouble, just for the fun. We got dozens of calls last year because he kept hitting/kicking/spitting at other kids at preschool. He once chucked a fry basket at waitresses in TGIFriday's because she 'took too long' to bring him a refill. That was the wakeup call we needed to get ourselves some help so that we could help our son. We failed him once for a good two years, so we weren't going to keep failing him over and over.
He is doing much better now, but it's not without a lot of pain in the process. We enrolled him in a more structured school and made some big differences in how we operate at home. The key is consistency! We chose the school we did for him because we knew that the expectations at school would be identical to our new expectations at home. This has done wonders.
The other big thing was when I had to sit down our preschooler and say, 'Mommy and daddy screwed up. We didn't give you the affection, attention, and discipline that you deserve, and now you are struggling to behave properly. That's our fault, we let you down and things are going to change.' It's pretty humbling to tell your kid that you are a parental screw-up, BUT it made a difference I think. He still has issues, but things get better every day. He's insanely bright and seems to be developing empathy now. I saw him help his sister up yesterday when she fell in the kitchen. He asked, 'Are you hurt? Do you need a band-aid?' This is the first time he's ever expressed concern for somebody else, and I bawled like a baby. He looked at me like, 'Dude, mom, what are you doing?' All I could do was hug him and tell him how nice it was that he looked after his sister, and tell him that I was proud of him!"
Nadezhda V. Kulagina/Shutterstock
"I'm trying to prevent my stepson from being a piece of trash, but he keeps being a horrible kid. If I talked to my parents the way he talks to me and his mom and other adults, I would have been smacked.
Deep down he's not a piece of trash. He just has his dad's unfortunate genes - he is a carbon copy almost. A 12-year-old has had me, in my mid 30's, completely beside myself. He straight up abuses me and no consequences work.
Luckily he's not breaking the law yet, but it seems that he's started to bully kids at his school because he is large. I wish I could show a videotape of how he gets when we discipline him. But he gets this psychotic look in his eye. And yes, he has punched me in the face before.
If that little brat ever gets arrested, he can sit there until they let him out of jail."
"My cousin is 18 now. He's really intelligent, but he's failed out of school twice, failed out of an apprenticeship and failed out of a vocational course. He hasn't stuck to any of them for more than 6 months. He's 18 and has literally no qualifications of any kind.
His parents are very successful and very wealthy and he's an only child. I remember my dad talking about a visit they had from the family when my cousin was four. Dad was playing with my cousin on the floor with some toys. My cousin, for no reason, smashed him in the face with the toy he was holding, completely deliberately. My dad's an ex-cop and is ex-military, he loves kids and he's great at playing fun and silly games but you do not mess around with my dad and he does not tolerate disrespect or violence from anyone at any time. So dad gives the kid a stern talking to; 'We don't hit people', 'That's not a respectful way to behave', 'We don't hurt other people in this house'. My cousin sits and looks at him blankly as he talks, waits for him to finish and then smashes him in the face with the toy again. The kid is just laughing and my dad is really freakin' heated now. Then my aunt sweeps in and picks up my cousin, who is still laughing, and tells him in a cursory way that he's a bad boy and to come away from there. Then she tells him to come and have a snack and play with a different toy and basically just ignores the incident completely. My dad was livid.
The kid hasn't gotten any better. When he was about 7, my aunt started asking the family to stop sending him actual gifts for Christmas and birthdays because both of his rooms were now completely full. Apparently, she bought him something every time they went anywhere and they'd just run out of space.
When he was 9, he was asked not to come back to one of the kids' sports teams he played on. Why? Hmm, maybe because he was such a little brat? In a world of wealthy people where pretty much anything is tolerated if you pay enough, that's hard to achieve.
He was a spoiled little brat from the start and I have no idea what his parents are going to do with the monster they created. He's quite friendly, but he doesn't say please or thank you. He also stays up all night, playing games online, shows no interest in ever getting a job or leaving home (where his mother cooks and does all his laundry for him) and just doesn't give a care about anyone else as far as I can tell.
I saw him at a family funeral last year for the first time in a decade. At the wake, we said hi and did the polite small talk. Then he went and sat at one of the tables with his headphones on and looked at his phone for the next three hours until the family left."
Lisa F. Young/Shutterstock
"My idiot brother is a criminal and has a substance abuse problem. I know pretty much where it went wrong.
At every turn, my mother would cover for him. If idiot brother missed school? It's ok! Our mother would go in and smooth it out. If he cut up a bunch of decorations? It's fine, it's fine, we'll pay, officer - no need to charge us.
When he stole a car and totaled it, she blamed everyone but him and got him a lawyer to convince them to drop the charges. Same deal with his first illegal substance offense - get him a lawyer, convince the judge to give him probation for two years.
I have seen her bail him out, talk him out, and connive him out of more legal trouble than anyone I have ever known.
He is completely arrogant about his choices in life. If you challenge him, you're a jerk. Talking sense to him is impossible because, in the echo chamber of his head, the only person who matters is himself. And why not? All through his life, hasn't his mother been there to shore him up and fish him out?"
"Not me, but my mom with my sister. She's been a self-centered, entitled brat since she was old enough to have intelligent thoughts.
My mom has given her everything she possibly could in life. She tried to pay for her to get through college, only 2 years after I was forced to either drop out or bankrupt my mom and make her lose everything she had (I dropped out). She still does whatever she can to buy her whatever she wants - food, gas, clothes, you name it.
But when my mom couldn't fund her college education anymore, it was world war 3. When my mom won't give her $20 for gas because she quits every job she gets within 2 months, she's a huge brat. When my mom won't let her drive 5 hours away to a rough city for a concert, because she's a 4'10, 19-year-old girl who has a bad temper, my mom's the worst person in the world.
Until recently, my mom's just said she's a teenager, she'll grow out of it eventually. I think she's finally realizing my sister is just a big brat who wants to be handed everything in life."
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