"My wife's extended family is from the Deep South, I'm talking 'stop when you run over a squirrel and take it home, cuz that's good eatin' Deep South.
Couple of years ago, her cousin was getting married after getting knocked up by some neckbeard. She went to the wedding and during the ceremony the preacher did the whole, 'dearly beloved we are gathered, blah blah,' thing, then pulled out a bucket of rocks from beneath his robe. He then had every single wedding guest file past the couple and take a rock before returning to their seats. Then, he told the guests that they had the right to stone the bride, as she was impure and had been impregnated with a illegitimate child prior to being wed. He paused for a bit then, when nobody threw a rock at the bride, finished the ceremony" (Source)
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